And I’m not talking about the sandwich munching, clock watching lazy feckers who closed most of the main arterial road into Chesterfied, while they took a well earned four hour lunch break. Leaving me, just the hour and a half sat in an almost stationary queue mainlining other peoples exhaust fumes, and teaching the kids the art of rhythmic swearing.*
No, it’s these Canada Geese which challenge everything I like about the Candadians. These duck bullying, food stealing rotters make a noise like a startled cat being roundly abused and biff any other water based mouths before making a beeline for their moldy bread. Such single mindedness and arrogance in the face of their peers made me wonder if they weren’t
Americans, Germans, Austrians People Of A Certain Imperialist Bent. Sorry for the crossing out, I’m trying to cut down on the hate mail.
They are just a bit fighty. If the ducks have been intimidated to the opposite side of the lake, they just start on each other. Maybe they’re imported from Manchester on a Friday night after one two many WKDs.
North was good tho. Not just in terms of it being a proper direction of travel either. However I have discovered why ADSL routers/wireless access points/microwaves/whatever are so cheap. It’s because they are indescribably shit. After five hours of nothing working, four calls to an Indian helpdesk who were lovely but clueless and all the rigorous troubleshooting that 20+ years IT industry can bring, I scooped the hateful electronics up and went in search of a goose.
That’s a Canada Goose in case you were wondering.
And just to prove, it was proper up north, here are some wooly sheep
So if it’s goosing you’re after, make sure you leave the pub early. You don’t want to get an ugly one.
* It’s important to get the inflection right. Buggery, bugger, FUCKITY, fuck, useless SODDING BASTARDS. Kids seem to learn pretty quick 😉