What the fuck is that?

Twice in one day. First the cast iron hinge pretending to be a mountain bike and now a “whatingodsnameisthat” new printer has been installed in the office. Apparently it’s super efficient drawing little power and using space age technology to save ink and, presumably, lives.

What is less clear from the spec sheet is the size of this planet friendly amalgam of fax, print, email and – from what I can glean – lentil growing. It is bloody enormous – I thought we lived in a world of ever increasing miniturisation where technology stuff is so small, it’s useless for both input and output; but hey who gives a shit, it looks great plonked on the pub bar.

But if you’re going to buck a trend, then give it a damn good bucking i say. We have HAL installed on the 7th floor with it’s eerie fan, frankly terrifying random paper sorting, dangerous whirling noises and a colour instruction screen clearly nicked from NASA. Technically sophisticated it may be but it looks like the bastard union of a filing cabinet and a 1970s photocopier. With a suitcase glued onto the end.

There is know way I’m risking sending any of my documents in the direction of “big mamma” because then I’ve had to go near it.

And it scares me.

2 thoughts on “What the fuck is that?

  1. Victor

    You wuss!

    Just send it a single page print job and ask it to collate and staple – then sit back and watch it die trying 😉

  2. Alex

    I attempted a simple attempt at an a3 print of something pretty but largely pointless (a metaphor one could easily apply to, say, Sweden). It hummed, it harred, it barfed out something resembling a bar code but – to defend the desperate to please scribber – it did send me a message.

    This roughly translated to “can you do something simpler in one colour with no pictures”

    It’s a triumph of stupidity over necessity and none the worse for that 😉

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