Flash Boredom

Dark out there isn’t it? Reminds me of a story of an dying wizard who wasn’t ready for a tense meeting with the grim reaper, so instead cast about himself with powerful spells to ward off the coming of Death. Then on entombing his still living body in a coffin sized box laced with much magic, he allowed himself the smile of the smug just before a deep voice in his ear lamented cheerfully “Dark in here isn’t it?

Grumpy Mean Time is upon us and with it seemingly perpetual darkness than brings “The Coming Of The Idiots”. Ninja Cyclists I can deal with, but not the other 90{45ac9c3234d371044e23e276755ef3a4dde8f1068375defba7d385ca3cd4deb2} who labour under the illusion that flashing lights provide exactly that. If one were being particularly anal, you could argue that a flashing light is working exactly half the time and that’s the whole problem. I ventured out into the middle of what could only have been “persecute an epileptic” evening with the black punctuated by a thousand tiny flashguns.

It is no surprise there are so many bloody accidents. Those things are hypnotic – I found myself mesmerised as a sailboat driven by sirens to a rocky grave. I actually find myself siding with the poor sodding car drivers – optical sensors overloaded by the flashing sequence of random LED’s. “I was forced to run over the cyclist because he was doing my bloody head in” would seem a pretty sound defense argument.

I’m sat here hours later with retinal memory delivering laser strobes onto overwrought optical nerves. It seems my options are limited to:

a) Stopping whinging
b) A large roll of tape and some tough conversations
c) Some kind of bar mounted Electro Magnetic Pulse Generator.

I have at my disposal a beginners guide to electrical theory, a soldering iron, a car battery and unlimited Internet access. What can possibly go wrong?

I fully intend to write the Berlin/Hamster post if only I can solve the cryptic brainteaser that would magically flash the pictures from my mobile phone to the PC. Both of which are running Windoze. I’m starting from the assumption that this may be the root of the problem meaning some old school hammer and chisel action may be required to tease them out.

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